I Supported My Family for Years—Then They Turned on Me When My Wife Got Pregnant

Family relationships are at the heart of our lives. They bring love, care, and support, giving us a place to belong. But they can also be difficult, with duties and expectations that not everyone can handle. Sometimes, family bonds help us grow, and other times they cause pain.

Hello Bright Side. I am Mike, and my family is causing me too much stress.

When my dad died, he told me to “look after the family.” So, I supported them for a decade, paying bills, buying a car, and even building a tiny home for myself, all while they did nothing. Over the years, I poured tens to hundreds of thousands into keeping them afloat while they stayed on benefits and didn’t work.

Every time I asked to put the house in my name, they dodged it. If I mentioned buying another property, they guilt-tripped me into backing down. They also had a habit of “borrowing” my tools when I was away working or removing parts from my cars to fix whatever heaps they had without ever asking or replacing them.

I built a self-contained 1-bedroom on the property out of my own pocket. But when my wife got pregnant, I decided my priority was going to be my own kid. I offered to buy the property officially. They came back with a price so absurd that no real estate agent would touch it.

So, I bought a new home. However, we were staying at the family house until the deal was closed, and we moved out. My son was 4 months old around this time, and I was at the family home caring for him while my partner worked. Just as I moved out of my old home, my sister called the police to report me for trespassing at the house I’d been paying for over a decade.

When that failed, she threatened to steal my cars. They started insulting me, calling me a “terrible father”. That night, a group of friends came to my aid. They moved all my cars and the rest of our stuff in, as we had started moving already. I was so emotionally wrecked that I broke down.

Thanks for hearing me out.

Here’s our advice to you, Mike. Hope it helps.

• Put your own family first: Your partner and child are your priority now. Focus on building a safe, happy home with them.
• Protect your finances: Don’t let anyone guilt you into spending on things that don’t help your future. You protected your family long enough. Now, they have to take care of themselves.
• Limit contact if needed: If your family keeps causing stress, it’s okay to step back or go low contact for your peace of mind. If needed, move further away and cut all communication.
• Care for yourself: You’ve worked hard on getting your life together after the passing of your father. Lean on friends, your partner, or support groups when things get tough.
• Let go of guilt: You’ve done more than enough. Looking after your family doesn’t mean sacrificing your own life and happiness.

Do you have any family members who make your life insufferable? How do you handle them? These stories prove that sometimes the healthier thing to do is to cut all ties.