A stingy husband is a recipe for a rocky marriage. If he’s made himself the house’s breadwinner and is cheap with a lot of requests, it can lead to lots of issues. The same can be said for Stacy. She’s dealing with a husband unwilling to help her in a time of great need.
Stacy’s letter to Bright Side.
My parents are in serious debt. They had to sell their home to pay it off and have nowhere to go now. So, I asked my husband, who is a landlord, to let them stay in one of his rentals for free, until they get back on their feet.
His response completely disappointed me. He said, “This is my business, I’m not a charity! They have to pay full price.” I went to tell my parents the next day, but my mom told me he called her first and told her that he offered her one of his places, but only in full price. So he basically just rubbed it in their faces that they have no money.
He’s so insensitive. He could’ve at least given them a discount or a couple months free just until they’re able to pay him back. Was he in the right to ask for full price?
Stacy D.
His lack of generosity is concerning.
Thank you, Stacy, for sharing your struggle. If your husband refuses to offer a rental for your parents, that is definitely off, especially if he already has other rentals that provide enough passive income for him to live comfortably. This lack of generosity is a bad sign and things can get worse in the future. You might need other things, and he might outright refuse to give you them because “he’s not a charity.”
You need to make your husband aware of how big his mistake was.
Separation is a big step, but it might make him realize how big his mistake was. He needs to realize that if he was put in the same situation, you wouldn’t blink an eye when helping his parents. This stingy behavior is just not fit for a comfortable and happy marriage, especially if you’re considering having kids.
Help your parents in other ways.
You didn’t specify in your letter, but is managing his rental property your husband’s primary source of income? If so, you’re basically asking him to take a salary cut in order to support your parents. You also never mentioned why your parents lost their home–was it due to a sudden emergency, or a pattern of overspending and bad investments? If the latter, then your husband probably understands that by letting your parents in for free, he will never get rid of them. But he will still have to pay mortgage, maintenance, and insurance on that apartment as long as your parents are there, and people rarely respect free stuff. Your emotions may be clouding your judgement, but I agree with your husband–in the long run, he is actually protecting your own future. You need to work with him and the rest of your family to find a solution for your parents that doesn’t involve them being permanently dependent upon your generosity.
